have you ever questioned why you do the things you do? is it for your satisfaction alone? is it because you want the approval and recognition that you desire from other people? is it so you will gain something in return? what are the things creating your drive?

I regret to say that with my recent change of heart I have lost sight of the bigger picture. I was finding much of my vigor in the hopes that one day a boy would love me too. I was thinking that if I became a better person and had the God-centered lifestyle that he was striving to have, he would have to love me back. how is that progress? how am I being true to myself? how can I have any real identity if I’m that easily influenced by an earthly person? I can honestly say I am disappointed and wish that this didn’t happen time after time. from here on out I vow to start living solely for my creator—because that is where I will ultimately find my supreme happiness. so Lord, I am asking you, fill me of you till I'm empty of me.