today as lucy and I raced down the huge hill to the park hand in hand the entire time I realized just how much I adore this child. I also realized I should allow her to come on runs with me-- she is super fast for a six year old. we’ve come a long way from the days when she used to throw up when I burped at the lunch table, when she was mad at me every weekend I went to visit friends in the city and when she would steal and hide my things and lie to me about it. a very long way...

she is patient and kind and my misunderstanding of how sensitive she is, was very difficult in the beginning because I didn’t like being unable to control her outbursts. she is adventurous and curious and asks questions that make me want to talk to her for hours. she has an eagerness for life. she wants to be american like me and has become a connoisseur of my version of the american cuisine-- cinnamon toast, peanut butter & jellies, yogurt parfaits, hummus and quesadillas. she is also weird like me and has developed a fondness for awkward dances in the middle of the street, kitchen, bathroom, playground, etc. she is witty and clever and puts pangs in my sides from laughing all the time. she is also so unassumingly charming and has no idea just how adorable she is. she has become a great friend. a small body with a huge heart and a sense of perspective that I seek in my daily life.

moments with lucy:

during one of my first weeks here, when I was driving the girls home from school for lunch, I forgot to yield to the car on the right. I had to slam on breaks which sent the girls flying forward and sent the word shit right out of my mouth. sweet lucy calmly responded, christina, there is no need to worry. josephine and I are perfectly fine. you’re a really good driver. promise! 

lucy met tommy on skype once and ever since she is pretty much obsessed with him. she always tells me I have to marry him because I love him, but what I find so sweet is that she understands that it’s hard to date somebody overseas and that I really miss him a lot. so she asks me about how he’s doing and makes certain I’ve talked to him recently. one day we were talking about how excited I was to see him and I told lucy I was probably going to tackle him to the ground with excitement. her response, christina, you don’t want to hurt his head! you’ve been waiting to long to see him. don’t send him to the hospital. it was then that I taught her the word considerate.

I told lucy to go up to my friends and say, yo, what’s up homeslice. she thought it was the funniest thing and though she nervously said it the first time, it became a popular phrase between us. she was furious at me one day after school because she said her friends didn’t think it was funny at all. all I could think to say was, well you’re friends clearly aren’t cool enough for you!

I was really sad on thanksgiving morning about not being with my family and apologized in the car to lucy to crying and being weird. she said, I understand you’re sad to not be with your family. that is how we are going to feel when you leave us for christmas holiday. 

one day I was washing the dishes after lunch. josephine tiptoed into the kitchen, consciously making sure that I didn't notice her. she lifted the step stool and pushed it up to the counter. it was too short so she turned around and grabbed a dining chair and pushed it up to the counter. I saw her the entire time and bargained with her that she could have the chocolate balls she wanted if I got to have one as well. they were the best goodness I’ve ever had in france, which is saying a lot because I have eaten a hella lotta chocolate here. when I asked lucy where they get them from she said, we got them in the mail from egypt I think... or wait, was it japan?... until I said if she told me the truth I’d buy more. and before I could even finish my sentence she screamed, at the bakery in meudon! 

I had to drive her to school in the twizy one day. this is an electric car where the passenger sits behind the driver and there are no windows. people look at you in that car like you are crazy and so we kind of played it up together. I put my hands out the window and started flapping my arms and cawing like a bird. she was dying laughing and embarrassed at first and then decided she’d join in and we’d do it together. so we drove slowly down the street by her school doing this, like we were in a parade.

we were late for school the other morning and she was wanting to run to the car. I was lagging behind and she turned to me and said, hop hop hop, get your head outta your bed, girl. to which I replied, I left it there because I intend to go straight back there after I drop you off.

today I was telling lucy how it was going to be really hard to leave next year and how much I was going to miss her. she said, christina please stay with us. you can go home and visit your family and stay as long as you need to. but when you’re ready to come back, we will be waiting because we love you! 

my little lucy knows how to love people and to love life. and I love have the opportunity to be by her side.